We were at full strength again this week for our lamington judging, with all three lamington tasters in attendance – Traditionalist, Diplomat, and Novice taster. Brought before us this week was (half) a tray of Brumby’s lamingtons. “Sorry, they’re from Brumby’s” apologised our Diplomatic taster. But a Brumby’s lamington is still a lamington, and therefore deserved to be eaten and judged by us. If anything, this gave Brumby’s the underdog advantage. We expected so little from these franchise lamingtons, that they could have wowed us more easily than any other.
Despite its underdog advantage, however, the Brumby’s lamington crumbled under the pressure. Like a cheap toyota from a used car dealership, it drove alright for the first couple of hundred metres before things rapidly began to fall apart. After the first bite, our Brumby’s lamingtons began to disintegrate. The icing separated from the sponge and in order to experience all three ingredients together, one had to pick up a little sponge, a little icing, and a little coconut from the plate, force it together and devour it as quickly as possible.
I will forever remember these lamingtons as the lamingtons that were left out in the rain – because that is the only way to describe the consistency of the icing. It had crossed the line from deliciously moist to wet. Even the box bore traces of damp where it had absorbed some of the lamintons’ excess moisture. For all the icing’s dampness, though, the sponge just did not want to absorb it. In fact, the sponge seemed to be openly rejecting the icing. Once the lamington was sliced, the icing began to peel off in sheets, leaving a naked square of sponge in its wake. “It’s a real problem,” exclaimed our diplomat, ‘it’s just not mobile.’ Indeed, the only way to eat this lamington was by leaning very close to the plate and holding the lamington tightly together until it reached one’s mouth.
The Sponge This was actually a very nice sponge in parts; light, creamy, sweet. Unfortunately, however, it had been a little singed on the top and the bottom and the taste of ever-so-slightly-burnt cake permeated the lamington. If only the baker had sliced a fine layer off the top and bottom of the sponge before cutting it into lamington squares, we would never have known. All three of our lamingtons suffered this same fate.
“It’s disappointing,” lamented our diplomat who had brought these disastrous lamingtons to the table.
I think we went a bit rogue when it came to scoring our Brumby’s lamington, though even our generosity has not saved them. I have to admit, there was some fun to be had in eating such a messy lamington, so I gave it an extra half point for entertainment value. Meanwhile, our diplomat added an extra half point for the service at Brumby’s, which was apparently exceptional. If only we could say the same of their lamingtons. It seems our novice was the only one sticking to the rules, although he seemed largely preoccupied by the price, “I feel like it should be cheaper, it’s from a franchise.”
The Diplomat: 5.9
The Traditionalist: 5.8
The Novice: 5.7
The Verdict: 5.8
This lamington was more of a donkey than a brumby I’m afraid.
Brumby’s | 228 Hawken Drive, St Lucia
$2.90 per lamington